Love is an enigma… Love is blind…Love is patient and love is kind…Blah blah blah. The concept of love has evolved significantly. The perception of love differs between each and every individual. For most people on this planet, love is a universal thing they wish to experience while others believe it doesn’t exist at all.  

“Love is fake,” said Zakira Johnson (24’), “I truly don’t believe someone can be with you your whole life and love you no matter what. 

Other students disagree. 

“Love to me is when someone truly cares about someone else. Someone that would do anything or even die for them,” said Isaac Hendrickson (24’). 

Melody Portillo (24’) concurs. 

“Love to me is when someone likes your persona, who you are, and doesn’t judge you. Someone who will be loyal and dedicated to you and will get through tough times with you and help you,” she said. 

Sometimes love isn’t what it seems to be. Media likes to illustrate to the public through broadcasted shows and movies like titanic and twilight or social media apps like TikTok that being in love is always sunshine and roses.  Sometimes love can be over romanticized because in reality love isn’t easy.  

One of our students decided to share their love story… 

“We met at the skating rink. It was eyes on the target and when I saw him, I knew he immediately was mine,” said Deirdra Brown (24’). “Unfortunately, he moved but we still kept our relationship strong. We also became good at communicating. It was all authentic. After a year, he had come down to visit and we went on a date to the skating rink where we had first met. The main challenge we faced was distance. The negative emotions we took out on each other (because of the distance) was the biggest problem we faced. But after he came to visit, we decided to do better and continue to work on different repeating patterns etc. we came to notice after being together for so long.” 

Red Flags 

Red Flags aren’t something that you should ignore. They can show up early on in a relationship or later down the line.  

Students, when asked to share some red flags that can show up in a relationship, said… 

• Not paying attention to your partner while you are with them 
• Lying and trying to hide stuff 
• Saying I love you on the first day of the relationship 
• Manipulation 

• Gaslighting  
• Victimizing  
• EXTREME jealousy 

(Disclaimer: Obviously not every red flag in the book can be listed but these are definitely a few you should look out for.) 

Love isn’t supposed to be perfect, but there’s definitely things that could potentially harm you and/or your mental state if you aren’t careful enough so, like my mom always says, when someone shows you who they are, believe it. 

Fears 

New love is fun to experience… but the anxieties and fears that may come with it are not.  

Some students were asked about fears they had regarding love. This is what they had to say. 

“Some fears and anxieties I have about loving someone is being vulnerable, getting hurt and getting used for sex,” Johnson said. 

Hendrickson said, “Something that is a fear to me about loving someone is if they feel the same way back. Sometimes it isn’t reciprocated, and this can lead to the end of relationships.” 

No matter how big or small that anxiety or fear is, if you can’t find a solution, it may affect how you are in current and/or future relationships. 

In my opinion vulnerability is one of the biggest fears I see in relationships for people around my age group and according to Allohealth.care, they state that vulnerability is a common fear that can arise in a relationship. Expressing affection and forming deep connections require vulnerability, which some view as a sign of weakness. This fear of being emotionally exposed prevents people from fully embracing and experiencing love, leading to a lack of REAL connections and emotional availability.  

This is why it’s important to encourage open conversations and promote empathy. Encouraging a culture of acceptance can dismantle the barriers that hinder individuals from experiencing and expressing love authentically.  

Students and teachers at Patriot were asked about advice they could give to either their younger self or someone younger than them about relationships. This is what they had to say, 

“Be accountable and don’t victim blame,” said Brown.  

Both of these pieces of advice are important to remember because if you can’t take accountability for your actions, it will cause unnecessary issues in all types of relationships (romantic/platonic). 

“Never settle and always know your worth,” said Mrs. Lundsford.  

This is also important because you never want to settle for someone who cannot give you what you know you deserve. If you believe you are worthy of more, then take heed of this advice. 

“Always explain your thoughts and feelings through disagreements and set boundaries, said Harley Bell (24’) 

Delulu is never the solulu so it’s important to form the healthy habit of communicating your boundaries and being straight up with your partner no matter what. This will build a better foundation of trust between you two. 

All in all, love, in its purest form, is a force that unites, heals, and empowers. Despite the negative factors, the essence of love remains resilient, and it transcends boundaries and fosters deep connections that fulfill our souls. It is truly such a beautiful thing.